Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Therapeutic writing

Where does the time go? Trying to find time to keep up with everything after having my 4th child now a year ago is a daily, daunting task. Sydney turned 1 on Feb 11 and it's been a fun and eventful year adjusting to 4 and having a little girl in the house. I always thought that having one more after having three would be no big deal. Boy was I wrong. Of course we have had our share of other "issues" to face head on this year in regards to the boys and Autistic Spectrum Disorders. God sure isn't going to make things easy for us.

Last week at church the pastor said that people in the states get comfortable and that you need to get uncomfortable and do things like take a mission trip or something to challenge yourself. Sean and I looked at each other and said "we sure are UNcomfortable!" Our mission field is our children...and for me....right now....it feels sometimes like we are out in the middle of no where trying our hardest to figure it all out.

And yet I don't have to figure it out. God knows the path. He knows just what roads I need to take. I just need to be quiet enough....still enough....patient enough to listen to his still small voice. Instead.....most of the time I'm running a hundred miles an hour, dishing out orders to everyone, disciplining and just trying to get through the day. Hardly ever do I stop to enjoy myself. I realized this today as the boys were all at school, Sydney was sleeping and I'm looking at my to do list and trying to figure out where to start. Sean has been out of town for 6 days (and it's been spring break) so I have been going, going, going. So this afternoon God stopped me in my tracks and I felt the need forgo all the to dos and blog for a few minutes.

The main purpose of this blog is for me to keep a log of my family. So I can print it out each year and have a recollection of all the fun we had that year. I'm reading Ann Voscamps book "One Thousand Gifts" and I realized why writing is so therapeutic. When you write it's more like it really happened. Kinda like how she describes writing down what she is thankful for. When she does that it makes the gifts God has given her more real. When I write down thoughts, events, feelings, it makes it all more real and I know it won't be forgotten. Trying to remember everything is stressful.

So, yet again, I'm blogging....and hoping to bring back the consistency I once knew here.

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